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Writer's pictureBill Gaultiere

How to Grow in Christlikeness with Others

Updated: 31 minutes ago


A person hiking through the mountains

By: Bill Gaultiere


All of us want to thrive in relationship with Jesus. But the journey to becoming fully loving apprentices of Christ doesn't come without challenges.


It reminds me of when I went hiking with my eleven-year-old son, David...


We were having a wonderful time on a twelve-mile trek up Saddleback Mountain near our home in California. Until we got lost while heading down the backside of the mountain without food or cell service.


I was afraid and kept asking God for help. Thankfully two hikers showed up with a map and guided us down the mountain!


Spiritual growth is like this. It's easy to get lost along the path that leads deeper into Jesus' heart.


All of us need a map that says "You are here!" when traveling through unknown spiritual territory. We also need support from each other.


A Soul On a Journey

Many earnest Christians long for greater intimacy with Jesus. They pray to look more like him. But they feel lost...


It feels like God lives in a galaxy far away. Reading the Bible and praying seem like chores. Serving others leads to exhaustion.


Ever been there? I know I have. Maybe you (or some of the people you disciple) are there now. The typical solution to "fix" this dilemma is to try harder. But this doesn't lead to becoming the kind of person who loves God and others authentically and wholeheartedly (Matthew 22:37-40).


You are more than a "human-doing" — you're a soul on a journey with Jesus.


And there is no one-size-fits-all discipleship curriculum to grow in Christlikeness.


The landscape of your spiritual journey transforms as you move through new seasons. Your needs are unique. The way you connect with Jesus changes. The disciplines that bring you life evolve.


The Spirit of Jesus wants to meet you in new and fresh ways — leading you into fuller joy and greater purpose.


But walking toward the unknown can feel disorienting or even dangerous.


This is why having a framework for different seasons of growth is helpful. We developed a model called the CHRIST stages of faith (from our book Journey of the Soul: A Practical Guide to Spiritual and Emotional Growth) that emphasizes following Jesus on a personal journey of increasing wholeness.


The CHRIST Stages

The journey through the CHRIST stages is not linear. It's also not a timed test. The goal is to walk with the Spirit of Jesus.


You'll relate the most deeply with your "home stage" but will likely resonate with other stages simultaneously.


Each stage below provides an opportunity to grow in grace. They are helpful in understanding your journey and the unique journey of others.


The C Stage: Confidence in Christ

The incredible journey of following Jesus begins as you receive his forgiveness, new life, and Spirit (1 Peter 1:3-4).


The H Stage: Help in Discipleship

You grow by following Jesus with other Christ-followers and practicing spiritual disciplines. Learning the Bible in community is especially life-giving (John 8:31-32).


The R Stage: Responsibilities in Ministry

You thrive in Jesus' love by serving him and blessing others. Discovering your unique gifts is fruitful and joyful (Romans 12:4-8, Matthew 10:42).


The Wall

Spiritual dryness and getting stuck are hidden opportunities for deeper growth and intimacy with Jesus.


The I Stage: Inner Journey

Spiritual renewal comes through emotional growth, empathy, and longing for God. Experiences of God's love help you know God more personally (Philippians 3:8, Ephesians 3:14-19).


The S Stage: Spirit-Led Ministry

Your greatest joy is to act with the Spirit's presence and power to serve others in Jesus' easy yoke (Matthew 11:28-30).


The T Stage: Transforming Union

Your soul's journey culminates with being united in the generous love of Christ as you practice God's presence in all areas of life (John 17:21-22, 1 Thessalonians 5:17).


Traveling Together

Traveling the path with Jesus trains you to become a guide for others.


This is the valuable role that pastors, small group leaders, and soul friends play for others.

All of us can take heart from the different stages of Jesus' life as he grew in grace (Luke 2:52). Simultaneously, we partner with his Spirit and overflow to help others as we mature to the full measure of Christ together (Ephesians 4:13).


The Journey of the Soul Leader Guide and Soul Talk Cards are perfect for small groups. You’ll learn how to understand the journey of people you love, give them empathy, and pray for their specific needs.


Plus, the Soul Shepherding Institute hosts 5-day retreats to help you access grace for your stage with friends you can trust.


I pray Jesus empowers you to offer empathy and wisdom to others from the well of a deep life in Christ.


Bill and Kristi Gaultiere

Bill and Kristi Gaultiere are Doctors of Psychology and the founders of Soul Shepherding, a ministry to help pastors, leaders, and churches to thrive with Jesus in emotional and relational health. They lead a Network of Spiritual Directors who offer empathy, guidance, and prayer to help people progress in their discipleship to Jesus. They are also the best-selling authors of a new book, Journey of the Soul: A Practical Guide to Emotional and Spiritual Growth.

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